Renee (princessoflight) wrote in thecondom_broke,

Title: Perfect, John's POV
Author: princessoflight
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: None really
Warings: Mentions mpreg, This story contains bastard!John.

Well, by now I’m sure you’ve all heard Jesse’s side of the story. He probably made me out to be some bad guy when that’s not it at all. It’s not my fault I did the things I did. I promise. I just couldn’t help myself.

Jesse and I have been best friends since we were children. He was always mine, always. If anyone messed with him I had his back. We were meant to be together and I wanted us to be together forever.

Everything that went wrong with me and Jesse was Adam’s fault. If Adam hadn’t come along I could’ve had Jesse forever. But no, Adam just decided to show up and take Jesse away from me. Every chance he got he flirted with Jesse, if he had the opportunity to touch or caress Jesse in any way he would do it, and fuck that pissed me off. So I left Taking Back Sunday and I dragged Jesse with me, he was my best friend. Not Adam’s.

But Jesse just couldn’t let Adam go. He’d talk about him all the fucking time, just to piss me off. He challenged me whenever I told him not to talk about Adam. I snapped one day and hit him. I hit him hard, he crumpled to the floor beneath my fist and looked up at me with fear in his eyes.

He deserved it. He should know not to defy me.

He started dating Vinnie a short while later. I had to engrain it in him that he was mine, and no one else’s. To do that, I fucked around with Vinnie, and I made Jesse fuck me on several occasions. When I found out I was pregnant, well, let’s just say I wasn’t happy. I didn’t ever want to be a father and now, because Jesse couldn’t glove it I was going to be one. We got into an argument one night, a rather bad one, and I went out and had an abortion.

Before you go off thinking that I’m some bad guy for having an abortion, let me tell you my reasoning. Jesse and I could hardly function as friends anymore, though we all know that he still wants to be with me, how could we function as parents? It was the best thing to do.

He took off after that. I didn’t hear about him for a few months, not until I was watching Fuse and I heard that he was engaged, to Adam FUCKING Lazzara. That shit just wasn’t cool man. I called him, disguising my voice and pretending to be his manager, I asked him to come to the studio for a bit. He came. He actually came.

Jesse was less than pleased to see me. But I begged him to talk to me. He wouldn’t. I begged him to let me back into his life. He wouldn’t.

There was something about him, in the months that I had gone without seeing him he had gotten so much sexier, so much more beautiful. I couldn’t help myself. I had to touch him, just once, I had to be with him, just one time. I was so overwhelmed with lust that I went on autopilot and a part of me that I didn’t know existed took over. Have you ever been so overcome with passion and lust that you have absolutely no control over what you do? That’s what happened to me.

I wouldn’t call it rape. I would just call it forcing sex on someone who doesn’t know that they want it. I bet he tried to make you think I was some crazy bastard who thought he didn’t want it. Nah, I know he wanted it. He just didn’t know he wanted it.

Fucking Adam. He decided to come and kick my ass the next morning, just for taking what was rightfully mine. I got a few scratches and one good punch in, I’ll be the bigger man and admit that I lost. Then Adam went home to Jesse.

He got pregnant. The baby had to be mine. I still think she is to this day. He was with Adam for how long and he never knocked him up, yet mysteriously after one night with me he gets pregnant. Coincidence? I think not. Take a good look at her. She looks exactly like my baby pictures, not Adam’s, not his. Mine.

I’ll get Jesse back one day. God as my witness I swear I will. I’ll get him and my daughter back. Adam won’t fuck up my life forever.
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